let me scoop us up and lay us in a bed of flowers
do you like them? i’ve made them for you-
from every kind word ive woven silken petals
from laughter ive inlaid their hues
each of your favorite colors, what are your favorite colors?
the door to my life, my heart
i’ve always opened this to you
always will, probably.
take my hand, i’ll walk us through our history
you know, in your eyes i’ve always seen
the symmetrical, best-blue camellia-
if anyone is better than me
i hope it’s you
i won’t say
‘do you remember’
‘cause let’s be honest,
who remembers their own birth?
but Jo, i remember,
in a recollection both muddled and clear
in the lofty shimmer of watercolor,
in a perch of pink roses
daisies in both of our hair, metaphorically speaking,
that day
or a day somewhere close to it
that day i traded apathy for white heather
i’m beating around the bush, aren’t i?
it’s just that i’ve never told anyone before,
it feels silly when it’s put into words but
back when you were small as a seed pod
and hadn’t even started growing yet
i dedicated an unspoken promise to you:
i will try to protect you, and if i cannot protect you,
then i will try to be kind to you and if i cannot be kind then Jo,
at least i would never fail to love you
at its brightest the sun
is almost a gentle white
against its flowing blue robe with tufts of clouds
with its golden ring
beneath it i’ve waited always for you
i slow my gait for you,
so that we can keep pace together-
i’ve wondered from time to time
if you ever noticed when i did it
or how i always tried to defend you,
i swear always i tried
let me give to you
the flower diphylleia
with its flutter-white petals, those freckles of soft snow
that drift now to kiss the cheeks of the earth-
allow me to give to you the diphylleia,
for with it i admit clarity
to tell you the truth, Jo,
i’d always hoped you’d know
that when they - ambiguous they - walked you back
and your back hit that wall
and there was nowhere else to go but through
straight through the needle’s eye, straight through the thick of it-
look, i’d just hoped you’d know without having to look
that i was always there in your corner too
always i take your side.